BROS

Thursday, October 28, 2010

THE ADVENTURES OF JIMMY NIKOLA: GENUFLECTION THE 15TH - PART 2

YOU ARE NOW MAJOR TOM!

You duck back around the corner as the Grappler's claws streak past your head. After setting up the markers around town, you made haste to Mustang Arms, the apartment buildings where the distress call had originated. Making your way up to the second floor, you didn't get much farther than the first corner, before being pinned down by enemy fire.

Arms fire. The grappler launches its claws again, striking the corner in front of you. The claws tear into the wall, gouging deep grooves into it before releasing it and retracting once more.

"Come on, you Stretch Armstrong piece of shit. Hit me!"

The claws fire once more, and as soon as they rocket past you,  you reach out and yank the arms towards you. The appendages go slack as the zombie is yanked off his feet. Spinning into the hall, you hold the arms down with your boot and shoulder your triple-enhanced rifle: VARIA DELUXE. A flick of your finger switches the knob from "SPRAY N PRAY" to "ULTRA DELUXE." You like to be flashy every now and then, and since this joker had kept you pinned in that corner for almost a minute, he deserves a bit of glamorous retribution.

You line up the sights and squeeze the trigger.

"Game over, Slim."


A WISE MAN ONCE SAID...

So, lately I've been reading a bunch of quotes. Not the usual inspiration quote thing, that's a whole 'nother can of worms. No, I've been reading quotes for entertainment. Most of them are from IRC channels, a large majority of them deal with nerd culture, and huge amounts are less quotes and more anecdotes. Either way, it's a great way to kill time that could otherwise be spent doing something productive. This operates on the "Just one more" principle that makes TVTropes so addicting.

The site in question is the Quote Database.

Not really sure how regularly it is updated, but there are plenty of quotes on there, ranging from mildly funny to wildly hilarious. You probably already know about it, or at least have heard about it, but now I'm taking a thing that was already popular and exposing it to more light! I'm like an "INTERNET CORRESPONDANT" for mainstream media. QND is like the new lolcats, a year after the fact.

But, you aren't here for my rise to trash rag reporting fame. You are here for adventuring. If you haven't gathered, this post relates to that aspect in a manner most tangential. To be truthful, I was hard at work writing the blog post in the hopes of getting it up before midnight (an hour ago). Funny thing, Blogger lies when it says it saves your work. Ha. Ha ha ha. That is funny, isn't it? Unless you want a post saying "YOU ARE RED JENCY" (Which is inaccurate, since I decided to wait on that bit until later), the post is far from ready.

Well. Time for more quotes, and possibly unconsciousness. Hopefully in that order. I will finish the post in the morning, I promise, and if I don't, may the internet be slightly irate at me until they realize the internet has experienced the Porn Singularity, and they go off to pursue other matters (matter-bation, as the term is commonly known.)

Monday, October 25, 2010

THE ADVENTURES OF JIMMY NIKOLA: GENUFLECTION THE 15TH

[X] Consult with F.O.R.T.U.N.E. before deciding.

"I think I'm going to check in with some people online, to see what else is going on." You say. Rick nods warily. 

"Okay, well, I'm headed for the hospital. I guess I'll see you there if you decide to come." He starts walking in the direction of the hospital before stopping and turning around. "And... good luck."

With that, Rick says goodbye and deserts you. You watch him disappear over the rises and falls of the various rooftops. You log onto F.O.R.T.U.N.E.


INCOMING TRANSMISSION

Sorry for the lack of updates as of late. I've had quite a busy weekend. Work was a pretty huge pain. Soups were going to be on sale, so I had to prep 100 pounds each of mirepoix (celery, carrots, and onions) on top of my usual workload. On top of that, I've been feeling pretty bleh lately, which isn't an excuse in itself, although it is contributory.

Throw in some New Vegas and you have a match made not necessarily in heaven, but definitely in some place where matches are made.

This is all just a roundabout way of saying that a new adventure is going to be posted by 6:00 PDT.